Everything Happens for a Reason

We've had some new trials come our way the past few months. About a week after my senior recital in the middle of April Tyler and I found out that we would be welcoming a baby into our home around Christmas. I was able to finish school alright without having any sickness or anything, just really tired. After graduation I started to have really bad morning sickness. The Dr gave me some medicine for it and I was able to function without having to lay down all the time because I felt so sick. Everything was going well, the baby had a good heartbeat at my ultrasounds and was measuring at about the right size. Then towards the end of June I went in for a routine 14 week check up. Dr couldn't find a heartbeat for baby. The ultrasound machine was really high tech and we were able to measure the blood flow from my uterus to the baby and there wasn't any blood going to baby. Baby was the size of a baby that would have been 9 weeks and 4 days along and I would have been 14 weeks along that day. We had a miscarriage. I didn't have any symptoms of a miscarriage; there was no bleeding or cramping or anything like that. My body didn't recognize that the baby had died. The Dr thinks that baby died somewhere around 11 weeks and my body just didn't know what to do. We decided to wait to have surgery to see if my body would recognize that the baby wasn't alive anymore and rake care of it like it was supposed to. A couple good friends massaged the trigger points on my legs and in my hands to see if we could get my body to take care of it by itself. Nothing worked. We waited for two weeks after finding out about the miscarriage before I had surgery. I had a D&C at St Al's in Boise on the 11th of July. The surgery went very well, Dr was able to clean out my uterus and I didn't have any complications and I felt very little pain. My stomach was swollen for a little over a week and I couldn't wear my normal clothes, which was more than a little frustrating with all of the emotional grief that I was already in. I was devastated. We tried for a baby for six long months and then lost it around three months. It's been really hard to deal with. I know that God had a plan but sometimes I wish I knew a little more of what was in it and how this is for the best. I have faith that this is what was supposed to happen though, even though it's definitely not what I wanted. It's been a hard couple months since this all has happened but I feel like I am doing relatively well. I have more good days and very few bad days. I'm still sad that this happened and I still wish that this isn't the way it has to be, but I'm happy regardless and I have hope in what is in store for us in the future.
Here are some memories from this experience for you.

Positive pregnancy test. Two purple lines means yes.


The first test with the three others that I did because neither of us believed the first one. They all say the same thing.


Me, 7 weeks pregnant


Me at 10 weeks pregnant. Not much bigger.


Funny cartoon I found



Ultrasound pic of our little guy/gal. It's facing frontwards and the head is at the top. This was at 10 weeks.


We are very sad to have lost our little baby. We don't know why we lost the baby but the Dr says that this happens in 20% of pregnancies and that theres no reason to think that it will happen again. Its just the body's way of ending something that wasn't going right, meaning that something was seriously wrong with baby. We have faith that this happened for a good reason and that someday Heavenly Father will see fit for a little baby to come down to earth to be in our family.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPod

Random: Anniversary, fun times and graduation!

This post will probably be a little haphazard because I can't remember what order we did things in. So I'll just go in order of the pictures on the camera, sounds safe enough ;)
This pic is from a long time ago, from a football game in the fall. I might have posted it before but it's funny so it won't hurt to see it twice, lol

These pics are from our second anniversary way back in March. I made a special dinner and dessert and we had a candle light dinner. I made a pot roast and rice and broccoli and we drank an alcohol removed wine called Fre. (it's pretty cool stuff)

For dessert we had a chocolatey pie type thingy with strawberries and whipped cream. Yummy!

I got together with a friend and had a craft Saturday. We made "sleeping bags" for our instruments. I made one each for my violin and my viola. The first two pics are the one for my viola and the third is the one for my violin on my violin and in the case.

This is the little adorable craft sewing machine that Tyler got me for Christmas that we used to sew the sleeping bags. It's teeny and gets the job done :)

I made this clock for Tyler for our anniversary this year. :) It was kinda hard to make but really wasn't too bad. 

I might have posted this pic too, these are all the flowers that were given to me for my senior recital :)

We like going to the park and feeding the ducks, especially the baby ones. We found these cute little babies at the park a month or so ago. They were the only baby ducks, lots of baby geese but no duck other than these.

 We also went to the Idaho Aquarium in Boise. That was a really fun thing for us.

 A Dory fish!

 Me with my favorite tank, I love all the bright colors and the cute little clown fishes.

 More Dory fishes.

 My other favorite tank.

 More prettyness

 Yes, that's a shark. Yes, I touched him. It was awesome.

 The sharks were in the same tank as these rays and you were allowed to touch them. And we did :)

 This little ray was so cute. He would swim back and forth along this wall and make the most obnoxious flapping noise that was really cute cause it was like he was showing off for you. He just kept doing it over and over and over. Funny guy!

 Then there was graduation. It was in the Taco Bell Arena at BSU. This is before all the graduates came in.

 I'm not in this pic but this is how we all got to our seats.

 I'm in this one, basically in the middle. I have the long, colorful dress on.

 I decorated my hat. No that does not say "33". Those are alto clefs, the clef that the viola plays in. Sometimes called a C clef.

 Me and my viola teacher, Dr. Lind Kline-Lamar. I was having trouble keeping my hat on. They were supposed to be one size fits all. Not the case. My head must just be smaller than average.

 All the fam. From left to right: Scott and Terry (Tyler's parents) and then my sisters Beth and Grace and then Dad and me :) Love all those guys!

 

 The violists that graduated showing off our awesome decorated hats :)

 All the graduating violists with our teacher :) Kinda sad to be done with college. Bittersweet

I have a diploma!

Look what finally showed up in the mail today!
(sorry, I can't figure out how to rotate it. :(. )





- Posted using BlogPress from my iPod

So, I'm way behind on posting. The last month and a half has been eventful to say the least ;) I will work on getting caught up on posting about our exciting lives just as soon as I find our camera that I used to document  all the excitement, not much point in posting about things without the pictures that go with them. Don't worry, finding the camera is on my to-do list for today. Hopefully you will have a lovely post (with pictures!) to read  very soon :)

FE: Passed!

Tyler passed his test! So proud of him for accomplishing this very difficult task! Way to go Tyler!



- Posted using BlogPress from my iPod

I made it!

Well, I did it! I've completed all my course work for my bachelors degree in music! I'm sure I at least passed all my classes and I hope that I got A's in most of them :) now I have graduation and a fun party with family and friends on Saturday! So excited! :) I can't wait to see all my family again!


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPod

I have:
Two days of classes.
One 10-page paper to finish.
Three finals.
A semi-large homework assignment.
Three rehearsals and two performances of Mahler Symphony No 2 with the Boise Philharmonic.
All in the next week.

Next Wednesday around noon I will be done. For good. Then graduation and a fun party with my friends and family. It's crazy, a lot of change for us this year. It's welcome change though. I'm excited for whatever life will bring next. :)








- Posted using BlogPress from my iPod