Everything Happens for a Reason

We've had some new trials come our way the past few months. About a week after my senior recital in the middle of April Tyler and I found out that we would be welcoming a baby into our home around Christmas. I was able to finish school alright without having any sickness or anything, just really tired. After graduation I started to have really bad morning sickness. The Dr gave me some medicine for it and I was able to function without having to lay down all the time because I felt so sick. Everything was going well, the baby had a good heartbeat at my ultrasounds and was measuring at about the right size. Then towards the end of June I went in for a routine 14 week check up. Dr couldn't find a heartbeat for baby. The ultrasound machine was really high tech and we were able to measure the blood flow from my uterus to the baby and there wasn't any blood going to baby. Baby was the size of a baby that would have been 9 weeks and 4 days along and I would have been 14 weeks along that day. We had a miscarriage. I didn't have any symptoms of a miscarriage; there was no bleeding or cramping or anything like that. My body didn't recognize that the baby had died. The Dr thinks that baby died somewhere around 11 weeks and my body just didn't know what to do. We decided to wait to have surgery to see if my body would recognize that the baby wasn't alive anymore and rake care of it like it was supposed to. A couple good friends massaged the trigger points on my legs and in my hands to see if we could get my body to take care of it by itself. Nothing worked. We waited for two weeks after finding out about the miscarriage before I had surgery. I had a D&C at St Al's in Boise on the 11th of July. The surgery went very well, Dr was able to clean out my uterus and I didn't have any complications and I felt very little pain. My stomach was swollen for a little over a week and I couldn't wear my normal clothes, which was more than a little frustrating with all of the emotional grief that I was already in. I was devastated. We tried for a baby for six long months and then lost it around three months. It's been really hard to deal with. I know that God had a plan but sometimes I wish I knew a little more of what was in it and how this is for the best. I have faith that this is what was supposed to happen though, even though it's definitely not what I wanted. It's been a hard couple months since this all has happened but I feel like I am doing relatively well. I have more good days and very few bad days. I'm still sad that this happened and I still wish that this isn't the way it has to be, but I'm happy regardless and I have hope in what is in store for us in the future.
Here are some memories from this experience for you.

Positive pregnancy test. Two purple lines means yes.


The first test with the three others that I did because neither of us believed the first one. They all say the same thing.


Me, 7 weeks pregnant


Me at 10 weeks pregnant. Not much bigger.


Funny cartoon I found



Ultrasound pic of our little guy/gal. It's facing frontwards and the head is at the top. This was at 10 weeks.


We are very sad to have lost our little baby. We don't know why we lost the baby but the Dr says that this happens in 20% of pregnancies and that theres no reason to think that it will happen again. Its just the body's way of ending something that wasn't going right, meaning that something was seriously wrong with baby. We have faith that this happened for a good reason and that someday Heavenly Father will see fit for a little baby to come down to earth to be in our family.

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